If you’ve been following me for any amount of time you know I’m not a fan of being exclusionary. I’m not a fan of lists of “Top Female” or “Top Male” whatevers because I feel that as long as we do this there will always be some sort of segregation. It’s one of the reasons I have been hesitant to attend BlogHer in the past. I like to learn and share with my peers – and that means people covering all sides of the gender spectrum.
This year, after having been persuaded by friends that I’m way off base with my thinking, and that BlogHer is a terrific place to network and learn, I decided to attend. As it’s in my neck of the woods, and as I’m working in the conference industry this year, I also felt it to be in my best interest. Also, I always wanted to attend BlogHer, but would rather spend my money on an event that encourages both men and women to attend. Not because I don’t believe in supporting or empowering women, but more because I feel less exclusionary events provide better networking opportunities. Conferences are expensive and I have to choose my events wisely.
I’m still not sold that these events need to be geared towards a particular gender, however.
This morning, I joked on Twitter:
The responses didn’t surprise me, but I didn’t find them to be completely accurate. For example, @LizaWasHere
Tweeted this:
I think “BlogHim” is called www.blogworldexpo.com. Just kidding. Sort of. #blogher
Except that BlogWorld is open to both men and women. Yes, there are more men there, but that’s because women choose to either stay home or spend their conference money on BlogHer or another event. However, each year, more and more women attend. When I mentioned this to Liza, she replied,
And #blogher is open to men, and likewise, some choose to attend.
True again, except the name applies to something else. BlogWorld isn’t called “BlogWorld for Men and Women” and no where on a SXSW announcment does it state, “both men and women are welcome to attend.” The advertisements aren’t gender specific and the name isn’t gender specific. No one has to extend special invitations to either gender. However, the “Her” in BlogHer makes it clear that this is an event for women, which is why not many men choose to attend.
Another interesting remark was made by @ohmylands said:
BlogHim is called the rest of the internet, I think
I disagreed again. The Internet has always been open to both women and men. We’ve been sharing the space for years, interacting and collaborating. There are plenty of woman dominating the search engines. Women are top bloggers and social media experts. Women are thought leaders and authors. And guess what? Most of the successful women in social media did so without standing on a podium and shouting out “I’m a Woman, damn it!” They just did what they did, and it stuck, the same as it did for men.
Every now and then I do get a little annoyed at seeing “super panels” at conferences that are led only by men, and you know how I hate those “Top Female Bloggers” and “Top Social Media Diva” lists, but I also think we create our own controversy.
- That’s why I don’t believe in the term “Mommy Blogger” or “Daddy Blogger.” Why can’t they be parent bloggers? Women made it clear they want to be known as “Ms” over “Miss” or “Mrs” and we now have “Postal Worker” or “Police Officer” over “Mailman” or “Police Woman”. So why then are we reverting back to gender specific titles?
- That’s why, at my traditional office job I didn’t demand the same treatment as men, I let my hard work speak for itself and advanced accordingly.
- That’s why I don’t want to be part of a quota, or feel I need to receive special treatment because I’m a woman in a male dominated world. I prefer to do my best and let that speak for itself over saying, “I’m a woman. If you don’t embrace me and what I do, I’m going to make a lot of noise.”
- That’s why I want to get ahead on merit, not gender.
Does gender bias exist? I think so. I’ve never experienced it in the workplace or in the blogosphere, and I don’t know that it’s ever been directed towards me, but I can see that it happens. I also think some of it is our own fault because many women feel it’s important to form organizations that exclude themselves from their male peers, rather than choose to work and collaborate with them.
I’m going into New York City tomorrow to attend BlogHer and I expect to enjoy myself. I will meet lots of interesting women and hopefully a few interesting men. Mostly, I’m going out of curiosity. I want to be proven wrong. I want to be pleasantly surprised. I want to see this is an important event.
What do you think? Do we create our own gender biases and stereotypes? Am I way off base?
